Notice Your Words - Guest Blogger Danielle Daost of GlobalPsychics.com

In Your Nots?
by Guest Blogger Danielle Daost of GlobalPsychics.com

Every once in awhile I run into a client who just doesn't want to believe that anything good could happen to them. They feel so victimized by the circumstances of their lives that they now believe that can't attract anything good to them. Whether in love, career or money they feel defeated, certain that the next disappointment is just around the corner.

When we get caught up in our "nots", life can be one long disappointment.

We get what we focus on. So when we focus on what is lacking, what we are not, life affirms our belief, that is the law of attraction in action.

The trouble is that life gets in the way of noticing when we are in our nots. We get so busy with so many activities that we are distracted from recognizing what we have really been thinking and feeling - and that we've been been thinking badly about ourselves.

One of the wonderful ways to tune into what is really driving us, to notice when we are stuck in our nots, is to begin paying attention to the words we use.

Words have power, so when we notice what is coming out of our mouths, and also what thoughts are flying through our minds, we can get a sense of where we have been tripping ourselves up, where our thoughts are in conflict with our goals. Then we can start reframing the "nots" into more positive life-affirming words… words that have the power to move us forward.

If you've been feeling stuck or in something of a slump, whether in romance or in business, do yourself a favour, keep a journal of your "not" thoughts for a week, and practice changing them. For example, note the times that you look in the mirror and the words "I’m too fat" or "my hair is a mess" fly through your mind. Then grab onto those thoughts and reframe them "I am getting better and better every day, in every way", or "I have a beautiful smile".

If you are diligent in this task, by the end of the week, you will find that you have a shockingly long list of "nots". You will probably be quite surprised that your thoughts are far more negative than you realized…. and what's more important, if you found uplifting language to replace your nots, chances are you've had a number of wonderful surprises as the week progresses.

Changing your thoughts, can change your life. Noticing your nots, replacing them with "yes" words can be a life-changing exercise. It is one of the first and most important steps in getting the Law of Attraction working for you.

More on the power of words here.

Bullying harms kids' mental health

As many of you know, one of my personal causes is the bullying movement. I believe that bullying is a form of peer abuse, it is an epidemic, and we desperately need to start doing something about this scourage before we create another generation of ruined childhoods. So when an article entitled "Bullying harms kids' mental health" caught my attention, my first reaction was "Captain Obvious strikes again".

I mean ... who needs another study to prove that constant abuse isn't good for children?

"Among identical twin pairs in which one experienced bullying between the ages of 7 and 9 and the other did not, the bullied twin was significantly more likely to have symptoms of internalizing problems."

Okay. So the question becomes "What are we going to DO about it?" While we study the problem to death, children are literally dying in our school rooms. What we need is a concerted effort to address the problem.

Classes like The Virtues Project and Roots of Empathy are available and have shown some success at lowering the levels of bullying in schools, yet it seems scientists and educators still need convincing that bullying is a bad thing. Why is this? Can it be there is some greater force at work in our collective psyche than the well-being of our kids?

I have thought about this a lot, and I do believe there are forces of that sort in play. It comes down to tribal thinking. There is a pervasive and perniscious idea in our collective mind that still believes it is necessary to abuse any child who is different, to beat them into a model of conformity that suits the model of "normalcy" currently in vogue. Bullies are useful to teachers who lack the time, talent, or resources to guide children into that model.

Bullied children fit specific character patterns. There is the "fat/skinny kid", the "hyperactive kid", the "overly bright kid" and the "wounded kid", to name a few. Hyperactive and overly bright, sensitive children may face bullying not only from peers but from teachers and school administrators as well, as they are seen as a drain on school resources and are challenging for teachers to manage. They become the class "scapegoat". Children with health, weight and disability issues are also frequently abused by peers, often with the acceptance and tacit support of teachers and school administrators. It all comes down to conformity.

I don't know of any studies addressing the root causes of bullying, and while I would be glad to see that happen, I would much prefer we start to sink some money into addressing the problem where it grows. It's time we stopped tolerating peer abuse, at any age.

Reviews: XBox Demos

Is there no vision or creativity in gameland lately? I just finished playing these four demos in under a half an hour ... not one of them grabbed my attention. I really feel that too many of the game developers have run out of ideas, at least where it comes to the XBox 360. All the games I've found compelling the last while I got to play on my friend Darren's PlayStation III.

Pirates of the Caribbean At World's End

The demo for Pirates of the Caribbean At World's End for XBox 360 finally downloaded into my console and it was barely worth the wait. I have an old XBox Pirates game, Pirates: The Legend of Black Kat, which I used to think was fun but a bit kludgy ... until I tried the demo fro POTC/AWE.

The game is dreary, lacks color, and the character animation, while somewhat reminicent of the movie, lacks any sparkle whatsoever. The only playable character in the demo is Jack, whose sword moves can't hold a candle to Katarina in the Legend of Black Kat ... a much older game.

Seems to me whoever put together the game for Pirates of the Caribbean At World's End was under a tight deadline to slap something together that basically looks and plays like the movie, but wasn't given a budget or the creativity to make it come even close to the movie's entertainment value. The music is not faithful to the movie's pounding soundtrack, the character voices come off as cheap knock-offs and the animation is stilted and

Battlestar Galactica

I loved both versions of the television show, both the classic and the updated, darker, more realistic version. I have to say I am extremely disappointed by the recent "new" version of Battlestar Galactica for XBox 360. The gameplay I can best describe as a slightly updated version of "Galaga". There is no feeling of actually flying the viper (so far the best movie flying game I have ever played is the classic Star Wars X-Wing Versus Tie Fighter, which I dearly wish was updated for XBox, but I digress). You are stuck on a single plane of movement, which compeltely kills the sensation of flying. The only thing the demo had going for it were some moderately interesting backgrounds and the pounding soundtrack.

Boom Boom Rockets

What the heck? A fireworks version of Guitar Hero? I guess if you like Guitar Hero and its ilk, you may find this game slightly diverting, but I hit the "stop" button within the first 30 seconds. Not even worth downloading the demo, especially not for the computerised, MIDI-like music tracks. Ick.

Crystal Quest

This game might be good for distracting the kids ... or to play when you are to tired, stoned or drunk to play a game that requires thinking. It might be good to play with grandma, to give her something simple to play so she can figure out the controller. It sort of reminds me a bit of Geometry Wars though it doesn't have the high energy and challenge, at least not in what they make available in the demo.

Make Your Own UFO

Whether you are a skeptic or a believer in flying saucer technology the Potter ufo glider is a fun flying model that is more than just a toy. Take the next step in paper airplane technology! Visit this page: http://ufos.coolmaxhot.com/flying-saucer-toy-glider.htm to download the instructions. The glider takes some practice to fly, I'm told, but this will be a cool project to share with your family over the holidays.

More evidence the USA is losing its mind

Girl, 13, gets detention for hugging two friends
Illinois middle school bans public displays of affection; parents urge change

Kids are getting bullied to the point where they kill themselves and others, and there is huge resistance to the idea of doing anything about it. But a girl gives a friend an over the shoulder hug and she's given detention. This is the second or third such story I've heard. I know of one case where a bullied child was allowed to suffer daily torture (including having pencils jabbed in his neck) at one school, but when he hugged his girlfriend, he was suspended.

There is absolutely no justification for banning HUGGING. We should be encouraging affection, not banning it. There are studies that show that human beings who get five hugs or more a day are healthier and happier than people who are not touched. Babies who are denied physical touch actually die at frightening rates. Our society is falling apart from the middle out, and I truly believe it is because there is a disconnect in our attitudes towards touching. Sex and affection are confused ... and since sex is seen as "bad", all affection is banned or taboo. Violence on the other hand is glorified. It's no wonder we have epidemics of violence. We need touch - and a slap or a punch is better than not being able to touch at all.



... I need a hug.

Bloggers Against Abuse

I'm a bit late for the Bloggers Against Abuse Campaign, but as many of you know, I have done some work in the anti-bullying field, so when BlogCatalog brought this campaign to my attention, I had to jump in. They are encouraging bloggers to talk about any kind of abuse. My pet peeve is bullying, and bullying is peer abuse. See www.peerabuse.info for more
information about peer abuse and how it can affect targets, bystanders, parents
and survivors.

We need more education for targets and younger students. One of my favorite efforts is The Virtues Project. Another is Roots of Empathy - an evidence-based classroom program that has shown dramatic effect in reducing levels of aggression and violence among school children while raising social/emotional competence and increasing empathy. Rachel Scott was one of the students killed at Columbine High School. Her acts of kindness and compassion coupled with the contents of her 6 diaries have become the foundation for one of the most life-changing school programs in America. Rachel's Challenge is a program that inspires students to bring positive change to your school atmosphere. The QuinnTessential Experience - Teen Basic - While not specifically an anti-bullying program, TQE is one of the most powerful confidence and empathy building programs available.

None of these programs will be that effective in a social atmosphere that tolerates peer abuse, or worse yet, encourages it as a sick sort of "rite of passage". It is time that bullies and their supporters were held accountable for the crimes they commit. It is time schools ended bullying before it starts. We need tougher laws and segregated schools where bullies can be separated from the rest of the school community until they learn to behave in a socially acceptable way.

Twitter.com

Okay ... so I am on this discussion group called Great Gear, which is a discussion group of artists and t-shirt entrepreneurs (http://groups.yahoo.com/group/GreatGear) and they are all ... uhm ... "a-twitter" about this new site called (wait for it) ... Twitter.com. They say Google really loves it. Everyone should "twitter" because it will drive traffic to your site. It's the latest thing in social networking. It's like a blog, but you can only post one sentence at a time. Sort of like a "text message diary" for voyeurs who want to peep into each other's lives. It's an answer to the old question, "Do you know where your children are?" ... well if they Twitter, it's not hard to find out.

Okay, all that's great, except for the life of me I can't understand why anyone would want to know that right now I am playing Kameo for the 800th time and watching my cat sleep. Still, the more I poked around Twitter and argued with the Great Gearians about how silly I thought this idea was, the more it began to appeal to me. Except I don't think I'll "tweet" about my personal life so much. I am going to find cool quotes, think up inspirational things to say, and post links to my latest creations in Twitter: http://twitter.com/bjasmine. I have added a Twitter box here to the blog as well, so you can check on my "tweets" right here.

Drop by and tweat me :-)